Home

"Home wasn't a set house, or a single town on a map. It was wherever the people who loved you were, whenever you were together. Not a place, but a moment, and then another, building on each other like bricks to create a solid shelter that you take with you for your entire life, wherever you may go." -Sarah Dessen 

It's 11:20 on a Thursday and I find myself  sitting in the Oakland International Airport. Once again, I am leaving something and venturing into the unknown. Walking through the terminal, I carry my faded paint splattered osprey, I wear my helmet and my NC2SD tank made by one of the sweetest people I've ever met in my entire life. The inside jokes on the back of my tshirt go on and on, but you can never fully understand them unless you were apart of NC2SD15. I'm not going to lie...I miss it. I miss the chaotic wakeups, the music in the morning, hot almond milk, Tess' laugh, Scott's saultiness, the Arizona sunrise, the smell of Colorado, the headwind of Kansas (but not really), the lack of coffee, and the feeling of family. The feeling that these people have my back no matter what.

I miss traveling the one with Carolyn, Abby, and Anna. I miss big sur, and the ocean, and the California coast. I miss the Southern California beaches and the way the ocean tastes in your mouth. I miss Alex rouse and the brown house. I miss being somewhere for a week and not knowing how to act because the longest you've stayed in a place for three months. I miss the California sunset and know I will long for it in the months to come. 

I miss baby blue, who is currently in a janky box on the way to South Carolina. Life goes on and so must I... But I miss it. All of it. 

Hh heavy on my heart is the life of Patrick, a leader on Me2SB15 who was hit by a distracted driver in Oklahoma. I didn't know him personally, but I know he was an inspiration to many. Throughout this tragedy I have seen bike and build alum come together from all over to support each other and to support the ME2SB team. It's inspiring. It has taught me that we are a family and we are here for one another. I haven't had a lot of words about Patricks death, but I FEEL it. 

I thi think about the tattoo itching on my back and what it means to me... The bicycle wheel. I think about Patrick and what his life means to me inside that wheel. Home. I take home wherever I go. Thank you Nyx Robey for teaching me that. The spokes... The spokes are different journeys in this adventure I call life. We're all in this together. Let's help each other. The wheel is nomadic going wherever it is called knowing that it takes home with it wherever it goes. That's how I feel about my life as I travel onward to Texas and then home. 

Th there is some relief in leaving California, but also a sadness. I feel like I am leaving a piece of myself here on the west coast. Maybe I will be back to get it one day. I am forever changed because of bike and build and because of this experience. I am in love with my life, but also mourning the life of another. 

T t. Thank you to those of you who have been a part of this. I did it. We did it. Here's to the future. Until next time....